A Deliberate Life


  • 10 Days of fly fishing
  • 9 Days of Camping
  • 3 States
  • 2 showers
  • 1 Nasty Cold
  • Countless Fish
  • Memories that will last a lifetime…


Behind the Scenes:

Here’s something a lot of people don’t know about me. Despite the fact I have a blog & do various projects on the Internet, I’m really uncomfortable with having any kind of  spotlight pointed my direction. It’s a bit of a personal dilemma and the private side of me wins out the majority of the time…hence the quietness of this blog and my interaction on social media.

Even now I remember the day I verbally committed to being part of this project. The internal fight that commenced inside my mind was pretty loud. The Quiet Private Me was understandably terrified by the idea, but the part of me that just wanted to go fishing for 10 days and share what has helped me along in life so much, stood her ground.

218178_4306008724710_608375328_n (1)I never got used to the cameras during the process, but I did my best to control the full on deer in headlights syndrome.

I really appreciated that from day 1 the expectation was to “Keep It Real” which meant no staged moments, no re-takes and no do-overs. That also meant I didn’t have to ‘pretty up’ for the cameras with makeup and hair and that was important to me. As the only female along for the journey I didn’t want to worry about how I looked or give the impression that before I go out fly fishing I take the time to look good for the fish.

Ok, I’ll admit it…a couple of times the girlie side of me protested when the camera was right in my face, and I tried snapping my fingers and called out for “Hair & Makeup” to come to the rescue. But apparently none of the guys possessed those skills because all I heard was laughter (and No Budget for that!) in response. All Natural It Is.

Grant Slinking Around Again

You just never knew where the cameras were hiding – Grant Taylor super sneak

A take on willpower: On the second or third day of the shoot (can’t remember) I woke up feeling like I had taken a solid shot to the head by a sledgehammer. A head cold/flu/fever/viral plague decided to join me for the rest of the trip and to this day I’m convinced the guys brought with them a Strain Of Hell from the East that they were immune and I was a convenient Western target.

Sadly, there's a lot of photos of me like this because of that cold

Sadly, there’s a lot of photos of me like this because of that cold

As much as I wanted to curl up in my sleeping bag and DIE, I opted for ‘drown the sick with drugs‘ and power through.

I went through 9 bottles of Nyquil that week throwing back a shot straight out of the bottle every hour like I was enjoying a flask of Whiskey.

My liver is finally recovered. Priorities ya know..

The Message:

I believe, even in the above 18 minute version, the message we all hoped to convey was achieved and for that I am proud.

The truth is, I feel like when I pull back and look back over the timeline of my life, it looks like more mess than having things under control. But…beyond the blessing that is my daughters and family…Fly Fishing has been my one passion that has remained unchanged and constant for me. It’s always been and I predict will always be, a source of genuine peace and comfort.

It’s what I wish for everyone, to have that one thing that is individual to them and no matter what life brings, they can count on it.


I know they can’t squeeze in 10 days of experience into 18 minutes…or even the full length version that is scheduled out next Spring, which means the majority of those incredible 10 days will forever remain in my memories.

But I have pictures…


Discussing the Garlock Stance – It’s Genetic, all the Garlocks do it

The Camera Posse

The Camera Posse

Captain Colby

Captain Colby

Riverside naps ~ Matt & Dustin

Riverside naps ~ Matt & Dustin

New Friends - During the filming I met Rachel & Aileen for the first time and I'm lucky enough to call them friends now

New Friends – During the filming I met Rachel & Aileen for the first time and I’m lucky enough to call them friends now

Late Night Campfire Time

Late Night Campfire Time

Luke - The Dreamcastidaho.com Mascot made his pictorial debut

Luke – The Dreamcastidaho.com Mascot made his film debut

Grant without (gasp) his camera

Grant without (gasp) his camera

Matt White is a brave soul with his spendy camera equipment!

Matt White is a brave soul with his spendy camera equipment!

Ross Slayton aka Nervous Water

Ross Slayton aka Nervous Water

Group Photo

Group Photo

And lastly….Matt Smythe.

He and I fished hard whether the cameras were on or off. He’s the kind of person I can fish with for hours without saying a word or fish in close proximity and laugh the entire time. I thank him for including me in the A Deliberate Life film and I’m beyond grateful for the friendship we have now.

He’s also an excellent travel DJ on the tunes…

Matt ~ Riverside Journaling

Matt ~ Riverside Journaling



Thank You goes out to all the support we’ve received from the people who had the chance to see it at IF4. The positive feedback has been humbling and inspiring.

Word on the street is the full length version will be available on DVD this Spring. I’ll keep you posted.

Picture Credits: Well…Everyone. Some of the photos are mine, some are by Grant Taylor, some are by Matt White, some are by Bryan Forsmann, and I have no idea who took what. Sorry guys…

More Info Link:
Silo Four


Photo by Grant Taylor…..I think…